What do you do when war breaks you, your faith falls apart, and you no longer recognize the person in the mirror? In this powerful Christian testimony, Iraq War veteran Ben shares how childhood rejection, brutal combat loss, PTSD, and nightmares pushed him to the brink of suicide—crying out, “Why did they die, and why am I still here?”

When everything seemed lost, Jesus met Ben in the middle of his pain and began to heal him from the inside out. Today, Ben helps other soldiers confront their trauma and discover that Christ can redeem even the darkest memories. If you’re battling guilt, fear, or shame from your past, this story will remind you that Jesus is still the answer—and He can write a resurrection story out of your deepest wounds.

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Chapters
00:00 Why did they die and why am I here?
00:18 Lonely childhood, bullying and a desire to prove himself
01:16 Encounter with Jesus in high school and a new calling
01:48 Deployed to Iraq: fallen helicopter, school bombing and shattered faith
03:13 Home from war: PTSD, nightmares and running to alcohol
04:00 The night he almost ended his life
04:51 Choosing God, counseling and learning to be honest about trauma
05:30 From broken soldier to helping other veterans find healing in Christ

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