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This is How Jesus Changed My Life, my Jesus Testimony. I Felt Far from God… How I Rediscovered my Passion for Jesus

How I was originally saved
I grew up in a family that took their faith in Jesus very seriously.
I Was about 5 or 6 years old.
I Didn’t really know what I was committing myself to.

How I fell into the sin of pornography and other influences that led me away from Jesus.
Some DVDs from the library had some very questionable content in them.
I had access to the family computer in our living room when no adults were around.
I got my first actual smartphone when I was about 14 years old (Late for today’s standards I know) and started listening to some very angry music, namely Eminem

How I felt uninspired and tried to fit in at my high school
I Found myself saying things that shouldn’t come out of a Christians mouth and got kinda called out on it
I tried to do what God wanted from me, but not really out of love, just because I’d always been raised that way

How college made me feel unplugged from my faith
I didn’t really have any time for fellowship with other believers unless I sacrificed all the time I could spend with family
I felt like God didn’t treat me fairly and that I deserved to have more success than I had with all of the work I put in with basketball and trying to live like Jesus

Feeling an incredible lack of purpose after college basketball
I felt incredibly angry with God about basketball, relationships, and the fact that no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t find any intimacy with God
Kicked my pornography problem and thought that once I fixed that, that my feeling of farness from God would go away, but it didn’t. Instead I found myself feeling even more unhappy that things weren’t going my way, because as far as I could tell, I was living about as well as a Christian could.

I started really making an effort to get into God’s word honestly. I kept a prayer journal, and just honestly spent time with God like he was an old friend. No matter what you’re doing to spend alone time with God, he will bless you for that. I realize now that this great emptiness that I’ve felt for the past few years in particular was God’s call to me to treat my relationship with Him like the #1 priority that it is. That’s the difference between religion and Christianity. Religion dictates that you spend tons of time keeping rules, and putting all of your stock into being a good person. The difference is that JESUS WANTS YOU! He doesn’t want the uptight, robotic, Pharisee version of you. He wants the real you, He wants your PASSION and ENTHUSIASM. And that’s part of why I finally feel like I’m genuinely happy in my faith and relationship with Jesus, I get to pour out my PASSION and ENTHUSIASM to My Creator who loves me, and made me with the gifts to create. God is Your Dad, Your Creator, but He wants to be more than that… He wants to be Your Best Friend.

Montell Fish’s Youtube Channel
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCb5Nk-dcWe15UiNsmJZTV0g

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