Summary
I grew up on a ranch in the Texas Hill Country, where life looked beautiful on the outside but was filled with abuse and fear inside our home. When things finally exploded with my dad, my brothers and I literally ran through the fields to escape, and that trauma planted seeds of anger, confusion, and a deep desire to kill my conscience so I wouldn’t feel anything. Moving near Houston, I just wanted to be “normal” and accepted, and that craving pushed me into weed, alcohol, harder drugs, and crime. I failed out of school, got kicked out, slept in bushes and parks, broke into houses, and chased a life with no rules. I told myself that real freedom was having no conscience and no fear, but inside I was suicidal and empty.
A terrible car accident in Colorado left other people badly hurt and me facing felony charges, jail, and the possibility of a long sentence. Somehow, no one died and my charges were reduced to probation and restitution. On the outside my life started to look cleaner, but on the inside I simply traded obvious sins for something more subtle and proud: spiritual “enlightenment.” A cartoon about chakras and meditation nudged me into Hindu mysticism and New Age ideas. I dove into the Vedas, the Bhagavad Gita, and Paramahansa Yogananda, meditated daily, practiced “harmlessness,” became vegetarian, and chased mystical experiences with “beings of light.” I called myself spiritual, felt superior to Christians, and even planned to abandon everything and move to the Himalayas as a yogi.
During that time my girlfriend Lauren became pregnant, and later we had a second son. We rejected marriage as a “Christian institution” but decided to keep our kids. Outwardly I was calmer and more disciplined, but my heart grew cold and indifferent toward her. We were basically roommates raising children while I obsessed over spiritual progress. I even read the Bible through a New Age lens and wrote it off as shallow compared to the Eastern texts. I thought all paths led to God and that Hinduism was simply a higher, more concentrated spirituality.
Then, after our second child was born, something started happening that I couldn’t explain. Out of nowhere I was tormented with thoughts about sin, judgment, and the name of Jesus Christ. I kept hearing in my heart, "What if Jesus is the only way?" I didn’t want those thoughts, but I couldn’t shake them. One night, after watching a creation versus evolution debate, I finally prayed honestly: God, what is the truth? Is Jesus Christ the only way, or do souls evolve through reincarnation? I opened the Bible and landed on Acts 4:12, which says there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved. It was a direct answer to my direct question, and my heart was pierced as I realized I had been worshiping false gods and rejecting the real Jesus.
I then asked God about the “beings of light” and euphoric experiences I’d chased in meditation. Again He answered from Scripture, in 2 Corinthians, revealing that Satan can appear as an angel of light and so can his servants. In that moment my entire spiritual structure collapsed, and I saw that my “enlightenment” was actually deception. I repented, believed that Jesus Christ alone is Lord and Savior, and trusted His finished work on the cross instead of my spiritual performance. I ran to Lauren and told her that everything we had been practicing was a lie and that Jesus is the only way.
A few hours later she woke up screaming from a terrifying episode of sleep paralysis. She felt her own legs moving toward our baby’s crib, with an evil intent she could not control, and sensed pure darkness. In fear we did the only thing we now knew to do: we called on the name of Jesus together and prayed, asking Him to save and protect us. The oppression lifted, and for the first time in a long time we lay down together with real peace.
Very quickly God led us to destroy our occult, New Age, and sorcery books. We ripped them up and threw them away. The same Bible I once dismissed suddenly became alive to me—sharper than a two-edged sword, exposing my heart and leading me into truth. Lauren soon put her faith in Christ as well. We got married, started attending a Bible-teaching church, and watched God rebuild our relationship and our family from the ground up. The suicidal darkness, addiction, and arrogance were replaced with forgiveness, hope, and a growing love for Jesus. He even brought reconciliation between me and my dad.
Today I’m a hairstylist near Houston, a husband, and a father who belongs to Jesus. I know now that no amount of drugs, mysticism, or “light beings” can save or satisfy a human soul. Only Jesus Christ—crucified and risen—could rescue a hardened, self-righteous Hindu mystic like me, and all the glory goes to Him.
Interview with Atticus Carr.
Atticus Carr was a young man completely devoted to Hindu mysticism and New Age philosophy. But then one night, for inexplicable reasons he began reading the Bible which opened his eyes to the truth.
Show notes and detailed description available here: https://compelledpodcast.com/36-hindu-mystic-meets-jesus-atticus-carr/
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Time Chapters
05:19 Ranch childhood in Texas 09:14 Move to city and culture shock 13:35 First drugs and school collapse 20:45 Homeless years and crime 24:52 Colorado crash and felony charges 27:36 Avatar, chakras and meditation 31:58 Relationship, kids and spiritual pride 36:42 Reading Bible through Hindu lens 39:10 Confronted by Jesus in Scripture 43:05 Demonic attack and calling on Jesus 46:48 Burning occult books and new life 50:20 Sharing gospel and reconciliation
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